Being ill sucks don’t you know? But oh, how the reminder of love that is still with you can soften the road to recovery.
If you are one who is ill, and going through it at the moment then I also send out some love to help you through. Know someone who is poorly? Then drop them a message to tell them you love them – snot, coughing, vomiting, pain and all.
When I feel at my most unlovable and gross these small things make all the difference.
Being a slow reader made me very self-conscious for much of my schooling until I was able to understand that it came from me being dyslexic. I realised (that in my experience) dyslexia meant that I took more time than the other academics around me to finish the same book, or even paragraph! I felt that unless I could devour a piece of writing or novel in an afternoon I should give up on literature and began to associate being a slow reader with being a bad reader’
Luckily I was able to find guidance from some good educators who helped demystify and simplify what it means to be a dyslexic learner and this gave me back confidence in the connection I had with literature rather than disadvantage I had with the mechanics of reading.
For me stories told through the medium of plays, graphic novels, films and radio are easier to digest. This may always be the case but now I am no longer frightened of delving into longer novels and after almost three decades am introducing myself to books I have always yearned to read but have shied away from given their page count.
How do engage with stories? Do you enjoy reading or have you, like me, been intimidated by school environments?
I’d love to hear your thoughts and experiences, so drop me a comment below!
There are times when I feel wrapped up in my own mind. Then, some instinct ‘taps me on the shoulder’ and I realise that I am moving through my day while disconnected from my body. Chaos is queen. Turning in, tuning back in and listening to my body, grounds me back into the present. The chaos settles into steadiness. Taking time to do small things with great love for my body re-aligns and balances me.
“Not all of us can do great things, but we can all do small things with great love.”
This quote struck a note with me at a time that an illness had taken over my ability to do anything particular ‘great’ with my life. I was struggling with doing even the boring day to day bits of life. At first it angered me. I wanted to rebel at the notion of not being able to do something great. I wanted to still believe that I could one day find my illness diminishing and recover enough to put it all behind me and then climb a mountain, change legislation, and contribute something fantastic to world literature…these were the ‘great things’ that fuelled my imagination.
Planting my head into the life I could or should be living instead of being ill was making the being part unbearable.
My imagination and will power alone could not shake off the bonds of my body.
And so this quote became a way to save my sanity. I had to reason with myself that I might never achieve these dreams. And if I could not I might become consumed by bitterness. No! I would not let illness turn me into someone who hated life. So the choice between living life embittered, or letting go of an imagined future, became an easy one. It felt almost practical in fact.
It made sense.
What also made sense was for me to re look at my blog. Things on my site had pretty much lapsed. Apologies, as blogging is definitely one of the small things I do love, and with Spring coming (or has it arrived? April is a tricky month in Britain) what better time to embrace a new beginning!
So here’s to the future on my blog, re focused around a new wisdom.